Vow of Silence Read online

  He lowered her arms, and she held them at her sides, allowing him to look. It was harder to be the one on display. She lacked the confidence Josiah possessed, but quickly became fascinated watching his expression while he examined her more closely. His hands rose to her breasts, testing their weight, fingertips curling into their softness. When his thumbs brushed over her nipples, she let out a surprised gasp at the pleasure arrowing between her legs.

  “So sensitive…” His tone rang with approval. “Responsive… You’re more perfect, more beautiful, than I’d imagined.”

  The muscles in her core twitched when his fingertips skated over the flat of her stomach to the button of her Englisher’s slacks.

  “I want to see the rest of you.” Seeming to have regained much of his control, Josiah undressed her with care. The zipper eased down, and he slid her undergarment off her hips with her pants.

  Butterflies erupted in her stomach when his knuckles skimmed her bare thighs. Heat bloomed between her legs, her sensitive folds growing slick with desire. Josiah grasped her hips and guided her to the end of the bed. When she sat, he lifted one leg free and then the other. When his palm skated over her calf, he paused, giving her a surprised but approving look. “You shave?”

  She knew what he was thinking—the Ordnung forbade it. But Cassie had done it, and Hannah had tried it out of curiosity. She loved the smooth softness of her skin, and continued the practice, figuring it was nobody’s business whether she had hair on her legs or under her arms.

  “Ja…”

  “Lie back.”

  When she hesitated, he asked, “Do you trust me, Hannah?”

  She nodded. “What are ya gonna do?”

  As she lay back, a wicked smile curled the corners of Josiah’s mouth. He reached for her, slipping his hands beneath her bottom, and boosted her to the head of the bed. “I’m going to make you come…”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Her knees pressed tightly together as Josiah gently grasped her ankles and planted her feet on the bed. Hannah’s mind raced almost as fast as her heart as she tried to imagine what he planned to do to her. Excitement warred with uncertainty, modesty combated desire as he placed a hand over each knee and encouraged them to part. This was not right. He couldn’t want her to—

  “Josiah…” she tried to protest.

  “Nein… Just trust me.”

  He eased her knees apart, and she’d never felt more vulnerable or exposed. Men did not view women like this. Then again, men she knew also did not want women on their knees. Or if they did, they would never admit such a thing. Not in her world. But Josiah was no longer of her world, and she didn’t want this night to become a clash of cultures. For this to be all she’d hoped, she would have to cast aside her ideologies and insecurities and trust Josiah as he was asking her to.

  When his gaze fell between her parted thighs, he muttered a curse under his breath and released her knee to scrub his hand over his mouth. “Holy hell, you honor me.”

  Words failed her as Josiah’s eyes lifted and locked on hers. The adoration staring back at her melted any insecurities she might have clung to. She stared at the beautiful man kneeling between her legs, and her breath stalled in her lungs when he dipped his head, pressing a tender kiss to one knee and then the other. He parted her thighs wider to accommodate his broad shoulders and knelt between them, his mouth following the trail of his hands as they slid closer to her center. Surely, he did not mean to…

  “Josiah!” His name left her lips on a startled cry as his thumbs opened her and he… No, she couldn’t even conceive the things he was doing to her. Pleasure beyond anything she’d imagined halted her thoughts. Surely, this was a sin, but she didn’t have the strength to stop him even if she’d wanted to.

  She had no idea her body was capable of experiencing this kind of passion. It was glorious and torturous at the same time because the ache knotting inside her wound tighter, building toward something she didn’t understand. She shoved her hands into Josiah’s hair, gripping it to push him away. The pleasure was too much for her to bear, but instead of shoving him back, she held him closer.

  “Please…” she sobbed, having no idea what she wanted, what she needed. Relief… She needed relief, but it hovered somewhere deep inside her, an unattainable ache in the most intimate part of her that remained barren. He groaned against her, and the vibration sent a shockwave echoing into her core, building higher. “Josiah…” she begged.

  “Stop fighting it, Hannah. Just relax and let go.”

  “I feel like I’m gonna fall.”

  “I’ll catch you, baby. Trust me.”

  …

  Joe wanted her to find her own release, to let her body carry her the rest of the way, but Hannah was fighting it. She was lost in her pleasure that was building to a point of agony—for the both of them, because he was ready to come and he wasn’t even inside her yet. Her body still had the sensitivity and naivety of a virgin. He’d tried going easy on her, not wanting to overwhelm her as he had earlier, but this wasn’t working.

  Fuck it, he’d have to take her release from her, because her body was too inexperienced to find it on its own. He reached up and grabbed hold of her hip, fingertips biting into her soft flesh to anchor her in place, then slipped two fingers inside her, burying them deep. She cried out at the invasion, and her hips bucked in surprise, but he held her tight as he sucked hard on her swollen little clit, pumping his fingers inside her once…twice…

  That was all it took. She shattered. His name was a broken cry on her beautiful lips as her tight glove milked his fingers, her body shuddering as her orgasm took hold and refused to let go. In his effort to push her over the edge, he’d almost taken himself along for the ride. If he didn’t get control of himself, he was going to come all over her quilt. Joe removed his fingers and chuckled when she cried out in protest.

  “Shh…” he crooned, kissing his way up her stomach, pausing to taste her strawberry pink nipples. “I’m not done with you yet.”

  Her back arched to his touch. “Never felt so good…” she moaned softly.

  “It’ll feel even better when you’re coming on my cock,” he rasped against her breast then playfully nipped the tip. Her startled gasp turned into a throaty moan as he seated the head of his shaft against her wet heat and gently pressed inside her. She was tighter than he’d expected. The way her silky flesh stretched to receive him nearly unmanned him.

  Damn, she was incredible… “You okay?”

  She nodded, but he could tell by the flicker of uncertainty in her eyes, she was a little nervous about their fit. He repositioned himself over her, readjusting his angle, and carefully rocked his hips, gaining a little more ground. She closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip. Each gentle thrust had her tensing beneath him. She didn’t understand how to relax her body, how to make it yield to him. In so many ways she was like a virgin.

  “Hannah, look at me…”

  When those beautiful trusting eyes opened at meet his, Joe fell in love with her all over again.

  …

  Josiah stilled above her as a flicker of emotion crossed his face. She wasn’t sure she’d be able to stand the pressure of him inside her. She wanted this so much, had waited for this moment for as long as she could remember.

  “Relax…” he whispered against her lips and then kissed her.

  It was a slow brush of his lips that melted into a deep erotic kiss. His hand slipped between them, and he touched her where they joined, sending darts of pleasure throughout her body. It didn’t take long for the ache to bloom inside her again, and the tension began to build. She recognized the quantifying sensations, understood what her body needed—Josiah.

  His touch was turning the pain to pleasure, and soon she was writhing beneath him, trying to take him deeper, wanting him to fill that secret place inside her so she could find her release.

  “More…” she panted against his mouth, nipping his bottom lip impatiently. Her hands moved down his m
uscular back, where the tension radiated from him, then slipped them lower to grip him, urging him forward.

  He chuckled at her insistence. “Greedy girl…”

  With a hard shove, he pushed all the way inside her. Her breath caught at the overwhelming fullness, but the fire his fingers stoked burned up any pain she experienced. She couldn’t resist moving beneath him, seeking that delicious friction. “Ja, genau da…” Yes, right there…

  “Oh, fuuuck, Hannah, stop moving.” He grabbed her hip, pressing her into the mattress. “Give me a second.” His voice was a strained rasp.

  “I… I can’t…”

  Her whimper must have been his undoing, because he swore again, then pulled back and thrust his hips forward—again and again… He wasn’t gentle. The impact was jarring but hit that sensitive place inside her that made her core tighten, building toward that wonderful moment when she would break.

  This uncontrolled side of Josiah thrilled her, power and passion emitting from him as he drove her to the pinnacle of release. This time when that familiar tingle began, she didn’t fight it, welcoming the euphoric rush of adrenaline flooding her body. “Josiah…”

  He slammed into her one final time. A barked curse tore from his throat as a rush of heat blasted against her core, rhythmic pulses intensifying her pleasure. She cried out again, clinging to him as her body cast adrift in a sea of bliss.

  Drowning never felt so wonderful…

  …

  Fucking whore… She thought she was fooling everyone with her innocent act, but he’d seen her dressed in her English clothes. English slut… She was just like the others, hiding her sin under her kapp of innocence… But he knew better. He saw through their lies, and he would expose every last one of them for what they were. She thought she was so clever, but she wasn’t the only one good at pretending.

  The detective thought he could catch him, but he was nothing more than a puppet acting his part, just like the rest of them. And by the time this play was over, he would end it with a final act that no one would see coming—especially Detective Josiah Troyer. He’d taken something precious from him, and he wanted it back.

  He waited for his next dove in the shed behind the barn. He stood in the shadows near the old chest where her dress, apron, and kapp were safely kept. She’d return here to exchange her clothes before entering the house. She wouldn’t risk getting caught sneaking into her home looking like an Englisher. The door creaked as she slipped inside, the soft glow from her oil lamp lighting her path.

  Right on time… He moved deeper into the shadows, watching her hastily shed her English cloths and don her true costume—the dark green long-sleeved, high-neck dress. Turning her back to him, she carefully folded the shirt and pants, tucking them away in the old chest. Moving silently from the shadows, he pounced, pressing the saturated cloth over her nose and mouth as his other arm came around her chest, trapping her arms against her sides. She futilely struggled, her scream smothered by the cloth.

  “Shh…don’t fight it,” he whispered in her ear. “It will only hurt more.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Joe woke to the persistent ringing of his phone. Squinting against the sunlight flooding the bedroom, he glanced at the alarm clock and cursed.

  Hannah moaned in protest when he attempted to untangle himself from her naked body. “Just a few more minutes,” she pleaded, snuggling in closer and rubbing all those soft, delicious curves against him.

  He was already hard for her, and she wasn’t making it any easier. “You’re killing me,” he grumbled, kissing her furrowed brow before reaching behind him and plucking his cell off the nightstand. “Troyer…”

  “Sheriff Stoltz here. Thought you might want to know a call just came in with the report of a missing Amish girl in Ephrata. Might be nothing, but the parents said she didn’t come home last night. I have a couple of officers heading over there to check it out.”

  “What’s the girl’s name?”

  “Ruth King.”

  “All right, send me the address. I’m on my way.” Joe disconnected the call and dropped back onto the bed. “Fuuuck…”

  Hannah stirred beside him and pressed a kiss against his chest. “What’s wrong?”

  “Another girl is missing.”

  “Oh no…”

  “Hopefully it’s just nervous parents and their daughter spent the night at a friend’s house.”

  Propping her chin in her hand, she studied him with a concerned frown. “But you don’t really believe that, do you?”

  Joe shook his head. “No, I don’t. I’ve got to go.” He sat up and tossed his legs over the side of the bed, then snagged his jeans off the floor. “I should grab Dexter on my way,” he said, stepping into his pants and hiking them over his hips.

  “Do you need me to come with you? I’m supposed to work today but—”

  “No, it’s in Ephrata. No one there knows I’m shunned.” He grabbed his gun off the nightstand and shoved it into the holster behind his back, then reached for his badge, fastening the clip to his waistband near his hip. “I think I’ll do a sweep of Heinz’s property with Dexter on the way,” he mused aloud. His mind was elsewhere, already processing everything he needed to get done and how behind he was when he realized Hannah hadn’t responded.

  A quick glance her direction revealed she hadn’t moved from the spot he’d left her, but she’d tugged the covers up to her shoulders as she watched him. Was this modesty or morning after regret? Unease niggled at him as he tried to read her expression. He didn’t like the uncertainty and confusion staring back at him.

  This was the part he sucked at—the balance between doing his job and not making the woman in his life feel like an afterthought. His failure to figure that out had cost him more than one relationship. The difference now was that he actually cared if this one stuck around.

  Joe shot a quick glance at the clock, torn to leave when he wanted nothing more than to stay. He rounded the bed and sat beside her. “Come here, sweetheart…”

  She allowed him to pull her into his arms and even returned the embrace as he held her tight. Resting his cheek on top of her head, he breathed in her lavender scent. “I’m not very good at this,” he confessed. “I have a hard time balancing my personal life and my professional one.”

  “It’s all right, Josiah. I want this man caught as much as you do.”

  Maybe she understood more than he gave her credit for. He was so used to the women in his life resenting his job. But if that wasn’t the reason for her troubled expression, then what was? He leaned back far enough to grasp her chin and tip it up. “What’s wrong, Hannah?”

  She seemed hesitant to answer. Since when did she not share her thoughts with him? “I’m not leaving until you tell me,” he prodded, pressing his lips against hers.

  “I’m just not ready for it to be over,” she confessed. “Once I get out of bed, I have to go back to real life.”

  “And you don’t think this is real?” he pressed, not sure he liked where this was headed.

  “I want it to be. But honestly it just seems too good to be true.”

  “Hey…” Joe framed her face and kissed her forehead. “You.” He kissed her cheek. “Me.” He kissed her other cheek. “And Eli.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “That’s your new life, Hannah. I’m not going anywhere without you. I won’t leave you again.”

  She nodded, but the doubt in her eyes killed him. He’d done this. He’d put this fear of abandonment in her.

  “How about when this is all over, I take you and Eli anywhere you want to go. We’ll get away, go on a vacation to some tropical island far away, and we’ll figure all this stuff out.”

  “That sounds wonderful.”

  Then why did she sound so sad? Maybe he misunderstood. Was she having second thoughts about leaving with him? Lord, he hoped not, because after last night, the only thing he was sure of was that he’d never let her go again.

  …

  Speaking to Elmer Bei
ler pretty much topped Joe’s list of undesirable duties. But if he didn’t question him about Cassie, he’d be letting his personal life affect his professional one—and that was unacceptable. He held out little hope that this conversation would end well, but it had to be done, and he didn’t want to make another trip out there, so, two birds-one stone and all that shit.

  “Thank you for taking me to get Eli. I know ye’re in a hurry, but I’m kind of stuck until my mare gets her new shoe.”

  “It’s not a problem, Hannah. I needed to get Dex, anyway. I’ll drop you off at the inn and pick you up later. Will you be taking Eli with you today?”

  “Ja…”

  “If you want to grab him and Dexter, you can meet me back in the car. I need to speak with your father for a moment.”

  Hannah shot him a wary look. “Are ya sure that’s a good idea?”

  Hell, no it wasn’t a good idea, but it was also unavoidable. “It’s my job, Hannah. Even if I get nothing from him, I still have to try. It’ll be fine. I’m not expecting a welcome home party.”

  They pulled into the driveway and he parked. “I’ll be waiting for ya in the car. Da will be in the barn,” Hannah said as she climbed out and then headed for the house.

  Déjà vu swamped him. It seemed like yesterday that he’d last crossed the yard to the barn. On the surface, everything appeared the same, right down to that Clydesdale, Daisy, who hung her head over the fence, watching him approach. Joe was pretty sure her welcoming nicker was all the hospitality he’d be receiving here.

  Veering right, he stopped outside the barn to give the mare a friendly pat. He might have been stalling as he battled back old emotions threatening to overtake him. His anger had no place here. What’s done was done, but that fact was a poor balm on the wound left in Joe’s heart. His entire life’s course had been altered by Elmer Beiler, and now they’d come full circle. Only this time, Joe wasn’t here to seek Hannah’s hand in marriage, he was here to find her sister’s killer. The irony of the events that transpired to force their paths to cross once again astounded Joe. He wasn’t a man who believed in coincidence, nor did he particularly believe in divine intervention.